Pondering Life Questions With My Son…

The other night before bed, my 12 year old son asked me, “If heaven is so great, and you always tell me I’m a big ball of love and light that came from there and will return there after I die – then why do we come here? Why not just stay in heaven forever?”

Whelp. I guess he’s definitely my kid. At this point my husband would have said, “go ask your Mom.”

Why do we come to Earth? Perfect, let’s dive into this at 10pm on a Monday night.  I do love this question though and thought it worth sharing our conversation.

I began by explaining it’s my belief that it’s our Soul’s choice to visit Earth. I believe the larger aspect of us, which you might call your Soul/Higher Self/Awareness/Consciousness, chooses when to incarnate (I believe we incarnate for many lives), to which parents, which part of the world, and which circumstances. I like to think of it as going to an amusement park or choosing to play a game. But of course Earth steps it up a notch by being a wildly immersive, multi-sensory, all-inclusive game.

The game of Life.

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Know Yourself As The Observer

I often talk to clients about finding peace among all that’s going on “out there” and “in there.” Something to try:

If you could picture yourself as a bit separate from what’s going on around you.  A bit of an observer – noticing the emotions, thoughts, sensations, smells, and sights of all that whirls and swirls in your awareness.  Both inside and outside the body.

Take a moment to stand still.  Still the body, slow the breath, and feel the weight of your feet on the ground.  Notice that when you stop – life continues to proceed and unfold around you.
There is nothing you have to DO.  Life is unfolding FOR you.

Now let go and take a step further back in your awareness.
Who or what is the still presence observing all that’s inside and outside?  Who or what is observing the emotions, thoughts, images, people?

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Life Is But A Dream

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion.
The great task in life is to find reality. 
-Author/philosopher, Iris Murdoch

How real is the world you’re looking at?  How solid is the chair you sit in?  Very solid, is likely the quick answer.  Yet as quantum physics has proven, this is not the case.  Science now proves that nothing is in fact solid.

As Albert Einstein said, “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”

Although we often don’t think about it consciously, it’s only through our physical eyes that your phone in your hand appears solid, and your foot in your shoe appears solid, etc.  Everything around us, including “us” ourselves, is moving energy.  Levels of vibration; waves of light.

I’m going to dig a little deeper, and look at the question: how real is our reality?

My son used to get terrible night terrors.  My husband and I would find him thrashing and crying in the middle of the night; reaching out at something that wasn’t there.  Yet his eyes were closed.  He was clearly asleep and didn’t realize he was dreaming.  He was experiencing something that terrified him enough that he cried.  My guess is either you or someone you know has experienced the same type of nightmare.

But soon enough morning comes, we open our eyes, and here we are in this reality.  Yet didn’t that dream you just had seem real?  That night terror was real enough to my son that his body was physically reacting.  Although he never left his bed, and he never opened his eyes.  It was all in his mind, in another part of his consciousness.

So we shake off the fog of sleep, get up, and go about our day.

 

However – what if this reality we look around at, the one science has proven is not in fact solid but constantly in motion, is just another form of dreaming?  Another layer of consciousness?  A type of illusion and an elaborate imagining of our powerful Mind?

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How Does A Healing Session Clear Emotional Thought Patterns?

Much of our day is spent on auto pilot mode – the state of being when we allow our minds to revert to the thought patterns that are most familiar to us.  If we aren’t aware of our thoughts, they just love to take over.  Our fearful thoughts are like my kids with their Halloween candy.  The more candy they eat, the more they want.  Yum!  The more fearful thoughts we think, the more the mind creates them.  

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Spring Into Joy

This coming Tuesday, March 20th, marks the Spring Equinox in the Northern Hemisphere.  This brings us a day of approximately equal parts daylight and equal parts darkness.  Energetically, the equinox is a perfect reminder to focus on bringing balance into our life.  As nature works on balancing herself by bringing warmer weather after a long Winter, it’s also a time for each of us to look at all we’ve been through so far this year, and focus on how to find more balance in ourselves.

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“The Spontaneous Healing of Belief”

Imagination is everything.  It is a preview of life’s coming attractions.
-Einstein

Today I’m going to recommend a thought provoking book to start off the New Year: The Spontaneous Healing of Belief by Gregg Braden.  

I’m going to use this post to lay out some key thoughts, or Belief Codes, that Braden details in his book.  These codes make you think about how we are interacting – and creating – our reality. In a time where fear often runs rampant, it’s so important to remember to keep our emotions and vision of what we want for our lives in the forefront.

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The Energy Of Grief

We’ve had a very hard couple months at our house – with my father-in-law first being on hospice and then crossing over/passing away less than two weeks ago.  He had a long and very brave seven year battle with cancer.  My family, and especially my husband, are grieving and trying to adjust as best as possible to this “new norm.”  What I am drawn to write about today is the grief process, and how our bodies, and more specifically the energy of grief, help us to heal.

Although I’m grieving the loss of my father-in-law in my own way, it’s obvious that my feelings of grief are nothing compared to what I’m watching my husband go through.  To lose a father is something on another level.

What I learned (which I am taught again and again) immediately after his passing is: I have no control over other people’s feelings, reactions, and mourning process.  While it hurts to see my husband in pain, I know that my own personal beliefs about life after death are not necessarily what he wants or needs to hear right now.  I realize it’s not the time to talk about the fact that his Dad is still right here with us and that he can hear you and see you.  It takes time to get to that place. and sometimes hearing those words can cause more anger and resentment than actual comfort.  I also remind myself that it’s not my job to convince people to see things the way I do.  I like to think I open the door and it’s up to people to walk through it and explore their own path to their higher self and all that goes with it.

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Finding Wonder & Healing In Nature

And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.
-Roald Dahl, author

I’ve written in the past about the importance of grounding our energy.  I believe clearing and grounding our energy body and auric field to the Earth is just as important as eating healthy, sleeping, and exercising.  If you find yourself feeling anxious, depressed or out of sorts, it’s very likely your energy field is clogged up with dense and lower vibrational energies we can pick up throughout the day: other people’s energy, the collective unconscious energy (think of all the patterns of behavior on the news), as well as various toxins.

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Remain Conscious Of The Energy You Spread To The World

The pessimist complains about the wind;
The optimist expects it to change;
The realist adjusts the sails
-William Arthur Ward, author

It goes without saying that the world we live in – complete with hurricanes, shootings, war, politics – can be daunting, confusing, and heartbreaking at times.  I too feel this when I read the news headlines and I question “what is going on?”  But after a bit of time stewing in the lower vibrating energy of asking why and how could they, I know it’s time to step up to the higher perspective. I take a moment to find my center, breathe into the present moment where my mind chatter calms down, and realize that the best I can do to help is to hold my own energy high in the face of the pain – and growth – going on in our world.

While I don’t ignore what’s going on in the news, I do make a conscious choice not to become addicted to the drama.  It’s easy to be sucked into the news cycle, where the effects can be felt both emotionally and physically in the body.  So while I choose not to trivialize events going on, I also choose not to let them darken my personal energy space.  This does a disservice to those who are suffering.  Instead, by consciously holding ourselves in a space of light, that is the wavelength we broadcast to the world.  And this is how the world grows and changes even in the midst of pain.

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Releasing Energy Patterns In Your Life

What came to me to write about today is patterns vs. habits in our lives.  What is the difference and how can a pattern in our subtle energy field (the energy we are surrounded by and made up of) show up in our daily lives?

First think of habits you may have.  Something as simple as the habit of eating peanut butter toast every morning for breakfast.  The beneficial habit of brushing your teeth vs. the not so beneficial habit of biting your nails.  Habits are things we often do without much thought – yet because they are a “habit” they are also easily changeable with a little motivation and self discipline.  While it may be annoying to have to change bad eating habits (the actual food you put on your plate) – it can be much more emotional and sometimes daunting to go further and change the pattern (what are the emotions and fears behind overeating or depriving yourself of food?).  See how the pattern is deeper?  Getting rid of the habit is cutting the weed away.  Getting rid of the pattern is pulling the weed out by it’s roots.

I think of a pattern as a strong force or lower vibration in the subtle body energy field.  I visualize it as a swirling ball of energy in someone’s aura that causes an imbalance in the body’s vibration, then mind, and eventually in their physical life.

An energy pattern can be formed in utero (yes, you’re effected in the womb by energy around you), or in early childhood.  Patterns are also carried over from past lives and from your ancestors that came before you.  They can also be formed in this life from a particularly impactful experience or relationship.  However that pattern started, if you allow it to remain in your energy field, it will do it’s job of playing on loop over and over – and bring those experiences that reflect the pattern into your physical life for you to experience over and over until the lesson it is teaching is learned.  That is, until you take control of your own energy, love every aspect of yourself (“good” and “bad”) and release the pattern once and for all.

We often forget that we are masters of our energy field.  Without realizing it, we create the day ahead of us by simply going on what happened the previous day.  Without mindfulness of our thoughts and emotions, it’s so very easy to slip into the loop.  Into a stuck pattern.  In this way, we are surrendering our control and missing out on the magical part of life.

So how can we heal these energy wounds and imbalances that show up as patterns in our lives?  It can be overwhelming to think of addressing energy patterns from ancestors that lived 200 years ago.  However, with simple awareness, intention, and self love – any pattern can be released.

The first thing to do is name the pattern.   Once you can pinpoint the pattern that’s limiting you, you open the door to healing.  Say it out loud.  Name the pattern = tame the pattern.  You take away it’s power.  By beginning to shed light on it, you lose your fear of it, which is the first step in dissolving it.

The second thing to do is lose any judgement of the pattern.  If you fear it, you are fighting it too much.  Love the pattern for what it is – something to learn from  – and it begins to loosen.

Then start asking yourself questions that will lead to self awareness and healing:

  • What are you claiming? What thoughts are you claiming as “yours” that you don’t need? (ex: “I am bad with money”)
  • What patterns are showing up in your life that bring you fear? (ex: “I know I’m going to get sick”)
  • Do you feel stuck in any area of your life?  Dig deeper and see the core pattern. (ex: issues of self love, fear of being alone, fear of not having enough)

The subject of patterns is so important, because they are often the very thing that is holding someone back from their life purpose.  It’s also important to remember we ALL have patterns.  We come into this life with them whether we choose to or not.  Intentionally calling out the patterns you are claiming as “yours” each day allows you to learn from them.  We learn compassion for ourselves.

We then begin to have compassion for people acting out in terrible ways.  What patterns were those people raised with?  What patterns are they acting out in this life from things their ancestors did lifetimes ago?  It’s a cycle that can be broken only with love and light – not shame.

Here’s a final example of how to not fear patterns of energy, but instead look at them as a learning tool to grow from and raise your vibration.  Imagine a person with an out of control drinking “habit” whose root “pattern” is fear of not being good enough.  If that person can have a small moment of awakening (it just takes a moment!) to acknowledge their pattern, they open the door to healing.  As they open up to more light in their life, bit by bit that energy pattern begins to dissolve into the universe (I actually visualize the energy clearing from the body).  The person is then filled with high vibrational energy and new momentum.  Maybe they’re led to become an addiction counselor and help others in their own stuck patterns.  See how sometimes the patterns we fear looking at inside of ourselves are the very patterns that are here to serve as our wake up call and open up new doors?  By working on clearing unwanted energy, new possibilities are made available to us that reflect what we really dream of in life.

If this struck a chord with you – take some time to be aware of patterns showing up in your life that aren’t serving you. Rememeber a pattern can be a thought or emotion – as well as people and events repeatedly showing up in your life.  If you notice something you want to release, welcome in these words:

I am stuck.
I have the right to know myself in a new way – I have the right to be unstuck.
I welcome changes in my energy field to lead me to more freedom
to be the best version of myself.

Go a step further and work with the angels around you.  You don’t have to do this all on your own – you’re surrounded by helpers just waiting to be asked.

I posted a little song below for some inspiration!

In Gratitude,
Nicki

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